RummE! Rhymes
by Ross7
Summary: RummE! Rhymes run rampant. It's always time to rhyme—for no particular reason. Don't need no good excuse, or no special season. Whether they be clever or silly,The words seem to come willy-nilly. Always love to share an E! laugh.
1. Chapter 1

**LoonE! Limericks**

**"LoonE! Limericks Loom Large"**

By Ross7

It's always time to rhyme—for no particular reason.  
Don't need no good excuse, or no special season.

Whether they be clever or silly,  
The words seem to come willy-nilly

Always love to share an E! laugh.  
(Though it usually gets me wheeeeeeeee-eeeeeeeezin')

**One**

**"E! Fanfic"**

By Ross7

We writers sure have a whole lot of fun  
With the firemen from Station 51

We give them 'owies' galore  
Bullets, burns, broken bones—and more

Yet they're always fine when our stories are done.


	2. Chapter 2

LoonE! Limericks

Two

"**The Phantom"**

By Ross7

John shows up for work with the rest of the men.  
He opens his locker and then

There's the sound of a _thud!_  
And Chet's name is mud

Cuz **The Phantom** has struck once again.


	3. Chapter 3

LoonE! Limericks

Three

**"Safety First"**

By Ross7

Gage was glad he wore a helmet on his head.  
Otherwise, he would surely be dead.

Cuz, when he entered the smoke-filled room,  
The flaming ceiling fell—with a _BOOM!_

Firefighters go where the Devil fears to tread.


	4. Chapter 4

LoonE! Limericks

Four

**"Batting Zero"**

By Ross7

Roy's partner spoke so fast it made his head spin.  
When it came to girls, Johnny just couldn't win.

Grouched Gage, "I can't believe I just struck out—again!  
Why can't women be more like _men_?"

DeSoto's smile graduated into a grin.


	5. Chapter 5

LoonE! Limericks

Five

**"The Phantom Strikes Again"**

By Ross7

Gage stared disbelievingly down at the blank pages of his completed report.  
Then he aimed an annoyed glare at his grinning cohort.

"Kelly, I'm gonna wring your neck! Cuz, yah know what I think?  
That pen you gave me was full of _invisible_ ink!"

Chester B. rose from his seat and began to retreat. "Ahhh...C'mon, John...Be a sport!"


	6. Chapter 6

LoonE! Limericks

Six

**"The Other Woman"**

By Ross7

Mike Stoker smiled and just continued to stare  
At the freshly-polished fire truck that was parked there.

The Engineer had two loves in his life.  
One was _Big Red_...and the other, his wife.

And he treated them both with the same tender care.


	7. Chapter 7

LoonE! Limericks

Seven

**"Oops!"**

By Ross7

As the men fell in for morning roll, Chet Kelly complained,"Shee-eesh! I have the worse darn luck!"  
"I can see Latrine Duty in your immediate future," their engineer predicted, and stood there, at attention,  
in front of his fire truck.

"Considering your water balloon hit _the Cap_,"  
Marco muttered, "I bet the decision's a snap!"

"You're on," Roy replied, "Here's a buck!"


	8. Chapter 8

LoonE! Limericks

Eight

**"The Phantom of the Firehouse"**

By Ross7

"I see it. But I don't believe it!" Mike Stoker quipped,  
As John Gage fell for _The Phantom's_ ploy and **the **wire tripped.

The drenched paramedic pulled the bucket from his head.  
Marco Lopez caught **the** look and determined, "Chet's dead!"

The 'pigeon' tried to take off after his tormentor—but slipped.


	9. Chapter 9

**LoonE! Limericks**

**"Reflections of a Fire Captain"**

by Ross7

Captain Hank Stanley was deep in contemplation  
When raised voices from the parking bay told him Gage and Kelly were at it—again!  
Shee-eesh! Was he running a Day Care Center?…Or a Fire Station?  
Both, he supposed, as _boys will be boys_…and _men will be men_.

It never ceased to amaze him that  
One minute, his _boys_ could be chasing one another with a broom  
And the next, his _men_ would be embroiled in a much deadlier spat  
Boldly waltzing through flames—in the devil's ballroom.

There were too many rigorous training sessions when they were tired—too many dull drills  
The guys griped. But there was so little time, and so much they needed to learn.  
So the Captain would continue to hone their skills  
Their lives, their safety—not his own popularity—was _always_ Hank Stanley's _chief_ concern.

Besides, Hank had five sons...five friends...five brothers, and the bonds between them had grown too strong to ever break.  
Their work frequently required that they lay their lives _on the line_.  
It was a Captain's job to keep his crew prepared. If his men were ready for the dangers, the fewer risks they would have to take.  
'Ye-es,' Stanley mused with a satisfied smile, 'I'll watch their backs…and they'll watch mine.'


	10. Chapter 10

**LoonE! Limericks**

**"Our Boy, Roy"**

A Tune Tribute To Roy DeSoto

(T'was written to be sung to the melody of: "My Girl, Bill" originally performed by Jim Stafford)

**"Our Boy, Roy"**  
by Ross7

There's this guy we all know  
Drives this shiny red truck  
Has a wife and two kids—three, if you count his partner  
(The one with the bad luck)

This guy's the 'senior', the 'blond', the 'blue-eyed' paramedic  
He's 'reserved', 'tall', 'handsome'...and so much more  
He's 'patient' and 'long-suffering'  
And he's loyal to the core!

Our boy, Roy  
Our, our boy, Roy  
Brings us tears of sorrow, and of joy  
He's our boy  
(Our boy, our boy)  
Our boy, Roy

Playing 'Hardy' to Gage's 'Laurel'  
Is he really driving? Or just along for the ride?  
Either way, the two friends face danger best  
When they face it side-by-side.

Who walks beside Gage's gurney  
In every fanfic that we write?  
Filled with angst to overflowing  
(Much to our delight)

Our boy, Roy  
Our, our boy, Roy  
Brings us tears of sorrow, and of joy  
He's our boy  
(Our boy, our boy)  
Our boy, Roy


	11. Chapter 11

LoonE! Limericks

Eleven

**"Hydrant Hi-jinx" **

By Ross7

Kelly 'accidentally' hit Gage with the stream from his hose.  
"Sorry," he insincerely said. "Sometimes, that's just 'the way the water flows'."

Johnny was madder than a wet hen.  
"I swear, you point that nozzle at me again…"

Chet's mustache twitched a time or two as he swiped a smudge of soot from the end of his nose.


	12. Chapter 12

"LoonE! Limericks & RummE! Rhymes"

Twelve

**"Firehouse Cuisine"**

Moans and groans, and grumbled complaints, issued forth when  
Cap' announced Gage had Kitchen Duty, to his men.

His Engine crew emitted more groans.  
If they didn't hear the Station's tones,

It would be either burgers or hotdogs—again!

* * *

**Author's note:**

An alert reader has recently pointed out that,

in order to be a true limerick, poems must

follow a strict rhythm pattern:

di dum di di dum di di dum A  
di dum di di dum di di dum A  
di dum di di dum B  
di dum di di dum B  
di dum di di dum di di dum A

Since my silly rhymes do NOT fit this 'limerick' rhythm pattern to-the-letter,

I am changing the name of this collection to just "RummE! Rhymes" . :D

:) Ross 7...almost sixty and still learning something new everyday. :D


End file.
